Chap. 36: Don’t wait for a traumatic event to happen to change yourself

No one likes change.

Everyone likes comfort, which is why no one single person on Earth would choose to change themselves right off the bat until something so traumatic happens that they have to change.

However, this is living life in a reactive way; it puts you in a submissive position. It takes away your power to take control of your situation.

That waiting for that final straw is like sitting there and giving up hope when there is always something to repair before it all has to end in a horrible way.

I used to have this kind of fatalist attitude on all aspects of life: my relationships, my health, my career and my personality.

I kept thinking to myself that I had to have a breakup or a bad illness or a bankruptcy or a really nasty remark before I could become the strong driven woman I wanted to be. I let myself fall into a weak spot and atrophy into someone I loathed just so that I could rebuild myself again after a huge event happens. Yet, deep down I never understood why I did that.

Then one day, I realized that I truly believed I needed to be in a pitiful position before I could prove to others that I came far from where I was in the “beginning.”

It wasn’t a helpful mindset. I noticed a recurring pattern: it kept ending the same way. I always tried hard in the beginning then closed myself off, sat in the figurative corner and never came out until I really had to.

This kind of thinking only hindered my happiness because my motivation to better myself was conditional. It wasn’t constant. I was waiting and being passive when I was supposed to be active and relentless.

Every moment deserves to be a happy one. Any moment spent otherwise is a complete waste of your potential and general well-being. 

Instead of waiting for that big traumatic event, sit with yourself and ask yourself: “How can I better myself right now? What am I running away from and why?”

Your motivation lies in your breathing; as long as you’re still breathing, you need to be always evaluating yourself and pinpointing where you need to pick up some slack. To be truly compassionate with yourself, you need to be brutally honest with yourself.

Don’t wait because it will be too late. By waiting for a precious aspect of your life to fall apart before finding a valid solution, you will only be setting yourself up for more failures of this kind in the future. Why spend the rest of your life searching for happiness when you can be happy now?

Fight for a better you. There is definitely no better investment in the world than in you.

May you breathe with honesty, love and compassion ❤

2 thoughts on “Chap. 36: Don’t wait for a traumatic event to happen to change yourself

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